medical update on the kids in my life...

i dont normally use pink text, but i will today for these little girlies!
my little 3 year old niece, Aubriana, has been undergoing testing for epilepsy diagnosis. my sister, her son (Austin 14), and her older daughter (Alexa 6) all have epilepsy. Aubriana has been experiencing seizures, so sis got her right in for testing. yesterday she had her first EEG and she did awesome! today she had to go in for breathing treatments and as a result, she had multiple seizures. she was in a controlled environment, but it's still a scary thing. heather (my sis) said that she had one that knocked her out cold and for longer than she has ever been out before... so, i'm sure needless to say, she was scared. we all are. heather says dr is probably going to put Aubriana on the same medication that Alexa is on. Austin is now 14 and was able to get off of his epilepsy meds a couple of years ago. hopefully the girls will "grow out of it" as well.

to learn more about epilepsy, please go to http://www.talkaboutit.org/


as all tuesday's are, today was clinic day for my little 5 year old cousin, Leah, who is battling acute lymphoblastic leukemia. she was diagnosed over halloween last year.

2 weeks ago her ANC was 456. 1 week ago it was 119. this week it is 200. the thing is, her ANC needs to be over 1,000!

please visit my cousin Sarah's blog here for their family updates.



also, my sister's live-in boyfriend has a son that was just diagnosed yesterday with swine flu... and his other son has been feeling sick, but not yet diagnosed. between my sis and her boyfriend they have 5 kids in the house.

please keep all of these little ones in your thoughts, prayers, meditations or whatever it is you do... they need some happy healthy strong vibes!

***this added wednesday 28 oct 09 - 742a - i found out my cousin ShawnDe has swine flu circulating in her household. she lives in north carolina with her husband, daughter, and 2 sons. from what i have heard, my cousin does not have it but her husband and kids do. add them to your good vibes list!***

i will not stop what is in my heart

tomorrow will mark 12 weeks since Pablo's passing from cancer. he was 6 years and 6 days old. i followed his story for over a year and became very attached to his beautiful Spirit. i am not posting reminders of death... rather, hopes, that his memory and life are not forgotten and his Spirit can live on in the fight for all children, families, and friends that suffer from this terrible disease. i have a little cousin, Leah, who was diagnosed last november with leukemia. i have been trying to start a fund in Leah's name. however, the banks are making me fight redtape since i am not an immediate family member. i am working with Leah's parents (my cousins) in an effort to help ease their financial burdens so they can focus on what is more important than the money - their Family. i look forward to helping Leah and any and all children that are living with cancer. the bulletins i post regarding the Pablove Foundation / Pablove Across America are all about how Pablo's family are still raising money and awareness and helping every single child they can, in memory of Pablo, in honor of Pablo. for all we know, their efforts in Pablo's honor could help cure our Leah. i hope and pray for that every day.


my dog, KaiYin, is 9 years and 9 months old. she was diagnosed with cancer when she was 3 years old. she has had 6 surgeries in 6 years. no, she is not "just a dog". she is my dog. my dog-ter. my baby girl. my best friend. and like many kids with cancer, she doesnt let it get her down. she plays and runs and jumps and lives and loves. i will fight for her with everything in me. KaiYin has been home 8 days since her 6th cancer surgery... and she proudly sports her Pablove shirt to cover her incision areas while she is healing.

i know that i have a good heart and honest intentions to make this world better in some small way. nothing was ever mentioned when i posted Pablo notes while he was alive. now, he has only been gone 3 months, and people want me to stop talking about him. i will not stop talking about Pablo, or Leah, or children's cancer. i will not stop trying to raise awareness and help these children that cannot help themselves.

if you do not want to read what i write to know or learn who i am as a person, what i believe in as a human being and what i feel in my heart... then dont click the links, dont open the notes, dont friend me on myspace or facebook, dont follow me on twitter.

i'll end this post with and excerpt from the Pablove Foundation Mission Statement:

"Every year, the Pablove Foundation gives money to improve the lives of children with cancer, at both a national level as well as a local level here in Los Angeles. As we carry out our mission, we wave a flag for anyone to see. On it are these words: Kids get cancer too. They need your help. It’s not somebody else’s problem."

my nephew, austin, moving

i'm currently working on a project going-away gift for austin. thought i would take a small break and write for a bit.

austin is moving next monday...
july 20, 2009.

this photo was taken this past saturday 11th, when we had austin's going-away shindig at the skatepark. austin is my 14 year old nephew. he is the son of my twin sister, heather (my only sibling). he was born the week before we graduated high school. so he's been around about 5 years shy of half of my life. i care for him the way i could prolly never care for another kid. i know they say that there shouldnt be favorites, but there always are... no matter how much you try. i moved around a lot in the 14 years of his life... but i have always tried to be here for him when he needs me. and sometimes when he doesnt! my sister was young when she had austin and my family did as much as we could for her and him... so sometimes i think the rest of us get carried away and consider him a community-son rather than a grandson or nephew. i know at times we have all been overwhelmed. but no matter what, no one can say austin wasn't taken care of! actually, this kid is prolly spoiled rotten because of all of us! well, he's been with "us" for 14 years. his father moved to tennessee when austin was around 5 years old (if i remember correctly). his father didnt fight for custody at all and has only just come back into austin's life the past few years. now austin is 14 years old and after a lot of talking and struggle and love... my sister has decided to let austin move to tennessee to live with his father and see how it goes. i know that this is what austin wants. and franc (his father) wants it, too. i really hope that this move is the change that austin needs to help him get motivated and grow to be the person we all know he has inside of him. i was in high school when my parents divorced. i didnt have a childhood filled with turbulance. i had a "complete" family. i know austin is still longing for missed time with his father. i'm not going to delve too awful deep into that one. i know every boy needs his father. maybe austin needs his more than ever right now. i hope it works for all involved.

when i moved back here 6 years ago, i would take austin on weekends and we would have sooo much fun! whether it was just watching movies, going to dinner... didnt matter... we loved to hang out. then i got a decent job and was able to buy season tickets to the kalamazoo wings ice hockey. austin and i had front row centered behind the home bench. we would stay for the meet and greets after games. he was a member of the kids club and got to go down on the ice between 2nd and 3rd periods. he always got to choose dinner before the game. it was usually "mongo" (mongolian bbq). i got him addicted. the kid didnt always want to listen to my new-food suggestions... but he always ended up loving 'em! i miss those days. i'm going to miss sooo much once he's moved. we all are. i know that my sister wants to do what is best for austin... but i know this is tearing her up, as well. i know that austin's little sisters alexa (6) and aubriana (3) dont really understand what it's going to mean for austin to be gone like this ... until he is actually gone. and even though austin really wants to make this move... i think he's going to be more heart-broken and homesick than he wants to believe right now. i dont think he has fully realized how much my sister - his mom- means to him and his world. i'm sure that's the way many kids can be. as adults we can see those things, looking back. but what did we really know when we were that age?

austin is super talented! he has the heart of an artist. i'm happy about that. i have always had the heart of an artist... i was always told i got it from my uncle. that makes me happy. i've done everything i can to encourage austin's artistic ability. heck, the desk i put in his room when they moved in to my place is decked out with all the art supplies a kid could hope for! i bought him a drum set a few years back since he said he wanted to be a drummer. i think he is taking those with him and his father is going to let him take lessons. that really pleases me. i think music and art are such wonderful forms of expression... and a great way to channel so much that we sometimes just cant express any other way.

okay... the more i write the more teary-eyed i get... so i'm going to stop writing about this for a bit.

austin jordan alvarez... if you are reading this you better keep in touch with us! email, texts, phone calls, smoke signals... whatever! you better keep in touch! i love you oodles and bunches!
silly rabbit.