For those of you fortunate enough to have Love in your life...don't take it for granted. Love with all you have in each day is the last. Always leave your partner with loving words and a kiss...and greet each other the same way. Cuddle as you fall to sleep...even if you stray in the night. Set your alarm 5 minutes early so that you can cozy up before starting your day. Sit on the same side of the booth in restaurants. Hide love notes for the other to find. Smile at each other. Hold Hands. Hug. Kiss. Touch...even if it's just hands passing in the hall or your foot to his foot in the middle of the night as you reposition in your sleep. It's the little things that mean the most. Whisper goodnight, sweet dreams and kiss him even if he's already sleeping. For those of you fortunate enough to have Love in your life...don't take it for granted. ~Angela Pearl

27 July 2010

i won't back down

quick note... nyc birthday...

just a quick note while i have sis's laptop.

i'm aiming for a long weekend in nyc for my birthday! i know most of you are thinking, "what the heck?! she's broke! how is she pulling off a trip to nyc?" well, i got a really good deal on airfare and i'm hoping to crash with a friend/friends, if at all possible, so i won't need to pay for a hotel.

i'm still trying to get moved to nyc this fall. but i just cant wait! i'm going crazy here and i need to get outta this town for a bit. while in nyc, i'm gonna be scouting apartments and such. i've had a decent flow of prospective buyers looking at my house recently. i'm hoping something goes through with the banks and i can get out of this house sooner rather than later. as it stands, i'm looking at november 6th to be out of the house. unless something with a buyer comes through before then. wish me luck! either way, i'm going to be sooo relieved to be out of here and *finally* in nyc! this move has been over 2 years in the making! hoping! dreaming! wishing! praying! it can't happen soon enough for me!

i'm still aiming to get a job with the aspca once i get to nyc and gain my residency. you have to be a new york resident to be employed with the aspca. to get my foot in the door, a friend of mine is willing to hook me up at one of his restaurants just so i have a job right away when i get there. granted, i didnt want to go back to serving... but i know it will only be for a short time until i get the job at the animal hospital. and i dont want to hear, "what if you dont get the animal hospital job?" because i will. i have no doubt. this is what i want to do and what i have been trying to accomplish for years now. it will happen. with all the bad that has been in my life, i really feel i am due for some good!

so, i will be in nyc thursday august 12 - monday august 16. if you or someone you know is in the nyc area and has a place i could crash, please let me know. i wont be there much. just need a place to sleep, shower, and such.

also, i am looking to sell my jeep. i will be sad to part with the baby beast, but it is necessary. i'll post more info later. if you or someone you know is interested in a 1994 jeep grand cherokee laredo that needs a bit of work... let me know.

i hope all is well with you and yours.
much love.
be well.

20 July 2010

angela update

whew! it has been a while since my last post! my apologies.
i still dont have home interwebbies hooked back up just yet. it is a luxury i just cant afford right now. today i have my sister's laptop for a few hours. for frequent and real-time updates, you can follow me on facebook and/or twitter.

so, i got a part-time job at jimi jo's ice cream shoppe. i only work a couple days a week. nothing major. but it helps with my utility bills. and i think it is also helping with physical therapy for my arms/wrists/hands. i really want to start playing my guitar. my friend ryan came over and showed me how to change the strings and such. i've just had a lot of randomness going on and havent been able to fully focus on guitar just yet.

what else?

im still trying to get this house sold. it is the only thing keeping me from moving to nyc at this point. foreclosure is november 6th. if i can sell it before then, that would be a huge relief... because if it doesnt sell and it goes into foreclosure, i'll have to file bankruptcy, and that will suck since my only debt is this damn house and some medical bills. i am 33 years old and have never had a credit card. i have tried to keep my credit as clean as i can. had a few people look at the house yesterday. and someone came by this morning (unscheduled) just looking around outside. i think they didnt know that someone is living here.

baby beast (jeep) is still in a coma. she needs a replaced fuel tank/pump/filter/gauge. but i dont have the money right now, so she is just sitting at ma and pa's house. i feel terrible that she is taking up space in their yard. but my friend that was towing her said he couldnt make the cut/turn with his flatbed to get her in my driveway. i really hate to give her up. i love that jeep. but at this point, with last year's accident (the deer that ran out in front of me) she was considered totaled and has a salvage title. and with all the money i have put into fixing her, i coulda bought something else. however... with all the work that has been done, she shouldnt have much else that can go wrong (knock on wood) so it would be silly of me to fix her all up and sell her for less. ya know? any suggestions are welcome! she is a 1994 jeep grand cherokee laredo.

KaiYin needs another surgery. she had a lump that showed up last year and i havent had the money to get it removed. it is the same place as all the other lumps that she has had removed (left hind quarter/ribcage area). they say that mast cell tumors usually recur in the same area. well, like i said, i havent had the money for her surgery ($2500) then when she heals from surgery they can do chemo/radiation ($3000) and then they said she should be fine for another 5-6 years. which, i hate to say, is probably all she has left. she is 10 years and 6 months now. but if i can make the last years of her life as happy and painless as possible, i will. you know i will. --side note-- chemo/radiation for dogs is not the same as humans. dogs do not get sick or lose hair. she would go in once a week for 4 weeks for pill/injections. then she would go in every other week for 12 weeks. then she should be done! the cancer should be all gone and not recur!

i am going this afternoon to talk to a financial adviser about the stocks i had with my previous employer. we didnt have "normal" 401k... we had stocks. so im gonna find out about diversifying and possibly taking money out from what i have in there for KaiYin's surgery. i was told that as long as i keep the money in stocks, the foreclosure bank cant touch it because it is considered retirement. im not sure if they will really care about $2500, but i cant sit by and watch my KaiYin get sick and possibly die. if they want to come after me for that, let them. i have the money there in stocks, and i'm not going to let some stupid fucking money-grubbers keep my KaiYin from getting the treatment she needs. if they may eventually foreclose on the house and come after me for $73,000... well, whats another $2,500... right?! i did all i could to make arrangements to save the house... and my real estate guy and i have done all we can to sell the house... but the bank has turned down every offer we have had from buyers. i dont know what they are up to, or why, but im tired of not having some kind of control in my life. the only reason im still here, and not in nyc yet, is because they said if i move before the house sells or forecloses, that it would be considered abandonment and they could sue me for the full amount of the house. so i am sitting here, in this empty house, all my stuff packed and in storage and ready to go to nyc!

blah blah blah... i could rant about this for hours! i wont bore you all with that.

so, i hope all is well with you and yours.
please keep me updated on yourselves as well!
much love.
be well.